1. Present this award to 7 others whose blogs you find brilliant in content and/or design or those who have encouraged you.

2. Tell those people they’ve been awarded the HONEST SCRAP AWARD and inform them of these guidelines in receiving the award.

3. Share “10 honest things” about yourself.

So, these are my 10:

1. I shave my arms. Body hair freaks me out, especially on women. I mean, we shave our legs because leg hair on a lady is just gross so what makes our arms so special? Nothing, that's what. Also, I have really hairy gorilla arms, probably thanks to some rare genetic defect passed down from my furry-armed father. Thanks, Dad. Thanks a lot.
2. I have a very serious girl-crush on Ellen Degeneres. But, I mean, who doesn't? Honestly, people. The woman is made of 7 kinds of awesome.
   
3. I cuss like a sailor. Like a drunk sailor. Like a really fucking pissed off drunken slob of a sailor.
   
4. I have a scar under my bottom lip from when I was 7 months old and tipped over in my walker, causing me to bite completely through the flesh. (The "Never Leave Child Unattended" warning was, in fact, not merely a suggestion, Mom.) The scar next to it is from when I was 12 and tripped over a lawn chair and bit through the damn thing again. (Seriously, Mom. Did you not learn anything from the whole walker debacle? Your daughter needs supervision! Close, competent, adult supervision at all times. And possibly one of these.)
   
5. Behind the sarcasm and cockiness, I am truly and deeply insecure.
6. I call my mom approximately eleventy-five times a day. Probably more, though.
7. I've always wondered what it sounds like when deaf people have sex. And now you're wondering too. You're welcome.
8. I'm a horrible liar. When I was younger, my parents could always tell when I was lying because I would blink my eyes uncontrollably. (Thinking about that always reminds me of that old song... "You can't hiiiiiide your lyin' eyes...")
9. I want to write a book. I have no idea how to go about it or what I would even write about. That being said, I still want to write a book.
10. Some days, I think about going off my meds. (I'm not going to, Mom, I just said that I think about it. I don't act on everything that I think about. For instance, I also think about what would happen if ninja monkeys took over the world. And that, my sweet little Momma, is what you should really be concerned about. I mean, can you imagine? People would be all, "Oh, look at the cute little monkeys in the precious little ninja suits! They're so adorable!" But that's how they lure you in. Sure, ninja monkeys look innocent from a distance, but they have wicked awesome nunchuck skills. And the little fuckers bite. See, Mom, aren't you glad that you have me around to warn you about these things?If it weren't for me, you'd never know the really important stuff. You're all caught up in the news and worried about swine flu and global warming, but the ninja monkeys are coming! Probably. Either way, I think we should be prepared.)
    

• Kimberly at Lots of Laundry
• Cara at Momma Says...
• Ashlee at Brain of a Mommy
• Kathy at My Kids Are Growing Up... Now What?
• Emmie at Life Behind the Curve
• al-pal at Here for my Dawgs and Crackahs
• Angel at The Mommy Tsunami